May 15-17, 2013
Feel stuck?
Want to start that next chapter?
Want to get out of your own way?
Your friend, Laura Rose, business and efficiency coach, is hosting a free online summit called: Light Your FuseFind out more at http://www.lauraleerose.com/light-your-fuse-summit/
The most misquoted verse in the Bible is probably Matthew 7:1, “Judge not that ye be not judged.”
It’s impossible not to judge. Telling someone else “not to judge” — shows you have made the judgment that they are judging. Most opinions, descriptions, decisions, views, rulings, and critiques are judgments.
In the workplace, performance review and evaluations are judgments on both subjective and objective criteria. Business decisions are based on market comparisons and our judgment on ROI (Return On Investments). Project management schedules and delivery schedules are based on group opinions and past performance trends.
I’m not sure when ‘judging’ attracted such a negative connotation. But we can’t take inspired action without allowing some level of judgment within us and others.
The key is to judge righteously and appropriately.
“Great! So how does one go about judging appropriately?”
In my GoTo Academy: Soft Skill Tools for the GoTo Professional continuous online coaching series, I go into these things in detail.
If you are interested in more training in these areas, please sign-up for the continuing online coaching series.
Here are a few things to consider, when making a ruling (or judgment):
- Be self-aware of any hidden agenda or expectations.
- Use accurate data from multiple sources
- Be wary of ambiguous and vague descriptions (indicators of innuendos, rumors and assumptions).
- Disengage from the results (have no hidden agenda or expectations)
- Don’t take anything personally
- Give everyone the benefit of the doubt
The above steps seem simple enough, but how would we incorporate in the real-world? Below are some common professional situations:
In my on-line coaching series, we use some typical employee complaints and frustrations. Please add your frustrations to this list for practice.
- My manager is not a people person.
- My manager has never learned people skills.
- My manager avoids confrontation at all costs.
- My manager is showing favoritism.
- My manager doesn’t like me.
- My coworker is a racist and is lying about me.
- My coworker is getting paid more than I am, and I’m doing more work than he/she.
- My coworker is always submitting buggy code and it the reason my piece is late.
- This company expects me to work 24/7.
- This company won’t give promotions or any type of recognition.
Be self-aware of any hidden agenda or expectations.
Most of the above examples have a hidden agenda. The ‘finger’ is consistently pointing to someone else. Maybe you know the saying, “When you point one finger, there are three fingers pointing back. And this is the case in these examples. We create our own situations (good and bad).
Regardless of the specific incident, you have contributed to your current situation. While blaming someone else provides some limited relief, it doesn’t really release you from your responsibility (your ability to respond).
Review your higher-level mission and what you can do to set things right.
“How could I have handled this differently? What can I do right now that illustrates my expert people-skills, my social skills, and my ease in handling conflicts and confrontations? This incident doesn’t depend on my manager’s people and social skills. This incident depends upon my expert people and social skills. My professional reputation is my responsibility, not my manager’s responsibility.”
Be wary of ambiguous and vague descriptions (indicators of innuendos, rumors and assumptions).
Ambiguity leaves the door open for innuendos, imagination and assumptions. When you are use words like: never, always, mostly, chances are that you don’t really have your facts together.
Use accurate data from multiple sources
As you gather your accurate data, validate it across multiple sources. Remember that each source may have their own agenda or personal perspective. Relying on one or two sources with the same personal agenda
Disengage from the results (have no hidden agenda or expectations)
When you are collecting the data, disengage from the results. When you have an idea of what you want the answer to be, you will often collect data that supports your expectations. If you enter into the discovery phase with no expectations and an open mind, you are more likely to make appropriate judgments.
In my GoTo Academy: Soft Skill Tools for the GoTo Professional continuous online coaching series, I go into these things in detail.
If you are interested in more training in these areas, please sign-up for the continuing online coaching series.
